Radiant Soul

Do you ever notice... How your energy drains when that one "friend" will be joining you and your other girlfriends for lunch? PAY ATTENTION!!! This applies to certain environments and situations too! I remember the feeling of energy leaving my body with every step closer toward my building at work. The environment just drained my life force. No windows... cubicles... everything was varying shades of a pale grey tone. Hmmmmm... do you think that coulda been a hint from the universe to get the heck outta there! But no... I stayed. I stayed because "the pay was good"... because "my job is easy for how much they were paying me"... because "I could do the job with my eyes closed". Except I couldn't close my eyes to how I felt every day when I had to walk into that building. Bored, no growth, no challenge... lifeless ground hog day. Maybe you can relate? Just like you might want to stop asking that "friend" to lunch wit...

No puppies were hurt during the writing of this post … that doesn’t mean I didn’t think about it.  😂 Sometimes… I WANT TO PUNT MY DOG SOMETIMES!!! I soooo love my fur baby. But DAMN! Sometimes he can be soooo annoying!! He always wants to be pet at the most inconvenient times! While I’m driving… while I’m writing... while I’m trying to pee… Ahhh!! And if he barks one…more…. time… while I’m trying to concentrate to meet a deadline or while I’m on a call with a client… he might  just get punted to the other side of the RV. Have you ever had an experience like this? Maybe with your pet… your children… your significant other? AHHHHHHHHH!!!! Truthfully, it’s not HIS fault. After all, he is just a little doggie. The truth is… he has what we all strive for. He is purely present in the NOW: see a dog = bark, see an easy opportunity for momma to pet me = puppy dog eyes and gentle persistent nudging until she complies. So then, why do I feel like I might want to send hi...

WONDER WOMAN would be an amazing friend/coach to have don't you think? She'd give great advice, be supportive, and yet.... probably wouldn't put up with crap either.  😂 I feel like Wonder Woman sometimes. I'd certainly love to wear that outfit everyday!  😂 I kinda feel like... Because I love you...As your friend... I'm here to listen quietly as you: 💜  complain about your boyfriend 💜  tell me the details of your breakup 💜  tell me about your deep sadness about your relationship 💜  tell me all the things you think you could have done differently...... But as your coach... and because I love you... I'm also here to: ⚡️ interrupt your pattern when you go on... and on... and on... and on... about him. ⚡️ make sure you're seeing things as they really are/were... not better... not worse... but reality ⚡️  affirm that whatever you're feeling... whatever emotions are coming up... FEEL THEM... don't squash them ⚡️  when feeling them...

When someone shows you who they are... BELIEVE THEM! This turn of phrase comes up a lot when someone is acting out in our life. When someone has been consistently rude, isn't treating us well, or has been showing their true colors in some nasty or devious way. It's particularly apropos in those moments for sure... But what about the flip side? I also like to consider this thought when someone is showing their heart. When they call to see how you're doing when they know you've been struggling, when they offer to get up super early to take you to the airport, or bring you soup when your home sick. They are showing you their heart! Showing their quality of character... demonstrating the kind of awesome person they are. Let's not take that for granted! Let's appreciate the heck out of it! Let's surround ourselves with MORE people like this! Better yet... let's BE this person! The one that treats others how we want to be treated...

In my dreams I have wings... BIG, beautiful, colorful butterfly wings. I'd fly around all day with my magic glitter dust and help people see, feel, hear and KNOW exactly what it'd take for them to be happy. Except I'm not a Goddess butterfly with magical fairy happy dust... And HAPPY isn't a thing... a recipe... or a formula. On my own journey to unravel the mystery of "how to be happy" I've discovered what I believe is the truth... the secret that most aren't willing to share... they'd find it harder to sell you crap you don't need, pills you probably shouldn't take, or some other hunk of plastic nonsense that's the latest rage. Here's the secret... ready? Happiness is a moving target. It is a daily, hourly, and possibly by the minute process. It's acknowledging and acting on the knowing in your soul that you don't want to do something, that you don't want to be with someone, or that something abou...

Over the years I've learned to listen more. I've learned to listen to others more intently and be more present and focused. Most importantly... I've learned to give MYSELF the same attention when listening to what my gut and intuition are telling me. I've learned that my woman's intuition is correct 90% of the time and that the remaining 10% is usually poor communication that I could have fixed by simply asking a question or two. I don't like ambiguity. I don't like miscomm unication (really just a polite way of saying NO communication). I prefer honesty, integrity, and CLARITY. When it comes to boundaries within a relationship this becomes even more important. Unfortunately, it doesn't always work out that way. If I watch my own patterns... the "nice girl" in me... the above and beyond kind one... she gives people LOTS of leeway. She makes up all sorts of reasons why it's ok they just did or said such and such. I over extend ....

There's a saying that goes something along the lines of... you are the conglomeration of your 5 closest friends. That means: 💜  if they have great relationships... it's likely you will too. 💜  if they have financial abundance... it's likely you will too.  💜  if they have great health... it's likely you will too. And if you don't now... you'll either grow into it... or you'll end up leaving the group. Your beliefs, energy, willingness to take action just won't match. With that in mind... I'll go one level deeper... do you like who you are around these people? This is the thing... sometimes we get around those playing at a higher level and we twist and contort to be who we think we need to be in order for them to like us. ❤️  Sometimes you genuinely are interested in the under water basket weaving art form! Sometimes you'll act as if you're interested even when you're not... just so they'll like you. ❤️  Som...

I'll never forget it... I was at an event... and the speaker was making a point about the difference between men and women when it comes to our feelings of safety and security. He asked the men the last time they felt unsafe... that their personal security was in jeopardy. Within the last 12 hours... no hands Within the last 24... no hands Within the 48... no hands At 3 days only a few hands in a crowd of over 5000 went up. Then he asked the women the same question... when was the last time they felt unsafe... that their personal security was in jeopardy. Just like with the men he asked... Within the last 12 hours? Hands flew up in the air. It felt like over half the room. The last 8 hours? Only a few hands went down. The last 3 hours? A few more went down. He didn't go any further... he didn't need to. As a woman... I get it. There are perceived threats everywhere. A man might not understand as he likely doesn't come up against another perso...

I know that I colossally piss people off ... Regularly in fact. HA HA! It's not intentional... And I'm also totally ok with it to some extent. You see, if I were to piss off a FRIEND, they would have a conversation with me and explain that I hurt their feelings or inquire what I meant by whatever pissed them off... Affording me an opportunity to clarify, apologize or retract as necessary and what is also authentically true. But if they aren't willing to have that conversation... Or we have the conversation and are unable to resolve the issue or at least agree to disagree... It simply means they are not part of my tribe. No big deal! They may not like my lifestyle, my attitude, my mannerisms, the way I dress, my belief systems ... Or a million other things that they could choose to like or dislike about me. You know what... THAT'S OK! Thank you for honoring and acknowledging your feelings! I respectfully request that you not smile to my face, hug me, as...